Monday, June 6, 2011

To SEE or NOT TO SEE ...

I guess one of the personality traits one must posses while having Juvenile Diabetes is a sense of humor ... seriously, if I was unable to laugh at half of the situations I've encountered because of this disease, I would probably be a total serious stick in the mud (lol ... if I'm not alredy there!!!), plus having a humor about it makes it seem less 'clinical' or technical.
I have realized lately that being a juvenile juvenile diabetic is so much more simple than being an adult juvenile diabetic, because as the adult version of myself, I worry about every little thing.  As a juvenile I still thought that the age of 40 was OLD and that blindness, kidney disease, and heart attacks could NEVER happen to me.  I praise God that these things have not happened to me (well...the blindness in the left eye, but that is a TESTIMONY in itself), and that I am leading a very full and productive life ~ yes, even with the 100 extra pounds I'm sporting... you know Insulin is a fat producing hormone, right??   (now THIS is something you need to have a great sense of humor about  ... but, hey! I'm healthy and always striving to lose 10lbs at a time!!)
So the sense of humor comes into play each and every time I walk into and walk out of a doctors appointment.  Now, I am NO stranger to dr's offices, appointments, etc.., but I always amaze myself at how humor mixed with serious thought can make a seemingly 'ugly' situation seem  more bearable. 

So, the other day I had to go to the Opthamologist/Retinologist - specialist for the retinal area of my eyes ... and I was incredibly scared to go in the first place, because this was the first time going back to this dr. in one year ...after a 3-4 year run with my eyes needing extra TLC, I was so happy to be able to go one year without having to come back, I mean, I'm the one that was coming in daily, then weekly, then bi-weekly to see the doc and get a better prognosis on my eyes each time.  The prognosis imporved, but my co-pays only got more expensive ... yikes!! 
So the big day arrived on 5/24/11 and I made my way to Royal Oak Beaumont Hospital to have my eyes checked for bleeding blood vessels ... (now that sounds really funny and could warrant a laugh or two ... I mean, which normal person goes intentionally to a doctor to see if the blood vessels in their eyes are bleeding??  Okay, maybe I have been diabetic too long ~ especially when it's a totally normal occurance!!) ... so I sat in the doctors chair holding my boyfriends hand and praying to God to heal my eyes, etc.. because I just KNEW there was something wrong with the eyes.  It had been a year with no eye exam... there was bound to be something the doc would see, right??  I mean, I have great insurance - so they could really cash in on  my eyes, right??  Oh, boy!!  Then out of no where I was beginning to feel a little twinge of pain in the left eye, and above all, it had been a YEAR of no eye checks - geeze - I need to slow down!! 
My name was called, and as Thomas and I walked to the little cubby hole area (tiniest little room with no door - so to me it's more of a cubby hole than a room)  where they check your vision field and eye pressures.  I look to the ceiling while the drops are being administered... right eye pressure taken ... left eye pressure taken ... I finally had to ask what the pressures were for each eye and the nurse said it was '15' in each eye!!!!!!  that's near perfect !!!!!!!  woo-hoo!!!!!  Thank you JESUS!!!!  Okay, so first hurdle down ... eye pressures are very, very, good - now time to see the doctor and have him check the retina and all those thousands of teeny tiny blood vessels!
Waiting in the room, Thomas and I tried to laugh about the long wait (why is it that all the specialists keep you waiting for atleast an hour in the waiting room and then another 30+minutes in the room??  Really ??  I want a discount for just sitting there and wasting everyones time!!  hahaha). 
Dr. Ruby comes in and turns down all the lights and turns on the brightest little light that he shines directly into the eye, and has my eye do a few exercises of it's own ... look up to the ceiling, right and up, right, right and down, down to the floor, down and left, left, and left and up!  Next eye...all over again!!  By this time I certainly am glad that I'm at the eye doctor, because I am actually 'blinded' by the brightness of his light and can't see at all ... so I'm in the right place!!  LOL !!
After checking both eyes the doctor sits down on his chair, makes some notes in my chart, and proceeds to tell me that everything looks GREAT!!  HUH???  WHAT???   REALLY???  (God certainly heard my prayers and took total pity on me sitting in that chair praying and praising !!)
Then the doctor says to me that he didn't need to see me back for ANOTHER WHOLE YEAR !!  Well, here is the humorous part .. I was not having that... No way!  No how!  I am not going thru another full  year without a check up ... I'm too worried about my sight for that!!  So, I looked at the doctor and asked him if it were alright if I came in in another 6 months, and that I would feel better if I could get them checked out at 6 months instead ... he looked at me and chuckled a bit, and said if it made me feel better than absolutely!!  Phheeewwwww!!! 
My boyfriend must think I'm a total nut case, but that is just part of what I consider the 'humor' to get thru this disease!!  Why should I wait one year when I can come back in 6 months and spend another $45 copay !?!  hahaha!!  Hmmmm... maybe Thomas is right...maybe I am 'not right' !!!
Until next time - Keep smiling and thanking God for all blessings, great and small !!!